Been exploring health and spiritual methods last 15 years. Here is what I’ve learned in 9 lessons since I know u internet folk like lists. So make me famous. Got bills to pay and these welfare checks are starting to bounce.

Note: I am an alien/artist so none of this may apply to you! And even if it did, I encourage you to break all rules and never listen to anyone. Nobody knows anything because there is nothing to know and truth is all a scam. Life is poetry. Language is a map in a maze. You live in a dreamworld.

1) No method does what the gurus promise. Life is too complex. Too many variables. Nature is the supreme master and after you have reproduced you are worthless alive and biodegradable.

2) They should not build cemetaries in the middle of the god damned city! Wtf man. Who designed Lappeenranta (where I live?) I wanna meet these people. Get the gimp out. There is a cemetary beside the shopping center that junkies use for a park. You really want yo’ people buried there?

3) You are not a victim. Stop falling for scammers and predator marketing like I did. These life coaches, therapists and gurus dont give a f*k about you, they just want your money. You are a statistic. Can already feel the boos.

4) Yoga is not gymnastics and camel toe neon pants. Its something much more radical and would threaten the fabric of your ego constructs if you grasped it.

5) Ego is a false identification with an over stimulated nervous system. This is the best ego definition I have come across. Credit: Matt Kahn

6) All the studies on nutrition and health are bro science. Too many variables. Human life is long. Impossible to study a population in a hyper changing environment. Correlations unreliable. Personal experience & anecdotes trump objective empirical studies.

7) Peer review process cannot be trusted (funded by industries that benefit from the confusion).

8) Psychedelics good for creativity and opening your heartmind. Not good for party drugs. Stick to the booze.

9) I personally feel best when eating omnivore and enjoying the delicasies of the world + traditional home cooked food. Morning coffee. Cold beer after sauna. They feed my addiction to chaos (see 5).

Thoughts?